


Love and Ineffability

by Crab_Lad



Series: Writers Month Good Omens [16]
Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Love Confessions, M/M, Missing Scene, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Soulmates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-21
Updated: 2019-08-21
Packaged: 2020-09-23 11:31:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,192
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20339416
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Crab_Lad/pseuds/Crab_Lad
Summary: Angels and demons don't have soulmates.But maybe, She planned it all along.





	Love and Ineffability

**Author's Note:**

> yeehaw  
day 16: soulmates  
enjoY  
i tried  
no beta we die like men

Angels and by extension demons didn't have soulmates in the way humans did. Born with a mark, a person could find their soulmate but simply seeing or touching their mark on the other person's body. It was something Aziraphale and Crowley had witnessed countless times, in awe of such a momentous occasion. It was a design She had insisted on, letting the humans find their match. Like all things She did for them, that too was a choice. Soulmates weren't always romantic, other times people would find their soulmates and a strong, unwavering friendship would be born. Others, things would go sour, and instead of love a strong hate was born. 

You were given your match, but that didn't mean you had to stay with them.

After years of seeing soulmates, after years of loving Aziraphale, Crowley loathed soulmates. It was a reminder to him that no matter what, Aziraphale and him would never be anything more than what they were. Aziraphale wouldn't love him back.

For the angel, he envied soulmates. The idea that someone who was the most compatible one out there for you seemed to help the humans through hard times. And yet, Aziraphale didn't have that. For him, he longed for Crowley to be his. But the lack of a mark proved that it was all doomed to fail.

"You can stay at my place, if you like," Crowley offered gently the night after they averted the apocalypse.

Aziraphale was helpless but to accept. 

The bus ride to Crowley's flat was quiet, but Aziraphale reveled in the closeness. For the first time in six thousand years no one was watching them, no one was holding them back. Without glancing over, Aziraphale slid his hand ever closer to Crowley's just until they touched. He felt the demon stiffen beside him for a moment, before his slender hand shifted closer still until it was resting on top of Aziraphale's. Turning his hand over, Aziraphale threaded their fingers together and looked over to the side to hide his smile. There was a slight shift from the demon next to him, but their hands remained entwined.

They left the bus like that, still hand in hand, and only dropped it when they reached the flat. Fumbling for his keys, Crowley mumbled nervously before he dropped them. Quickly, Aziraphale ducked down and picked them up, searching for the right key. It was the only other key on the key chain that didn't go to the Bentley. He unlocked the door for Crowley and Crowley sent him a grateful look before gesturing him inside. 

"Mi casa es tu casa," Crowley said airily, with a smile, as he stepped in after Aziraphale. 

It wasn't the first time Aziraphale had been in Crowley's flat, but it would be the first time he would stay over. While he didn't feel the cold air of the flat really fit Crowley, he did appreciate the small touches that proved that this was Crowley's home.

First, Aziraphale headed straight for the plants to coo at and admire them. Crowley followed, grumbling about spoiling them but let Aziraphale continue regardless. Once he had made his round, Aziraphale turned back to Crowley and stepped forward. With a nervous look, the demon glanced up at him. 

Disgruntled, Aziraphale objected, "You don't need those when you're around me." 

There was a pause, then slowly, Crowley raised an arm and slid the glasses off, tucking them into a pocket of his jacket. They were silent for another moment as they stood, just watching each other. 

It was Crowley who broke it, "Do you think we're off the hook?"

Aziraphale answered with the shake of his head, "No. I'm afraid not."

"Then this could be our last night."

There was a touch of sorrow in the statement, one Aziraphale wanted to purge from Crowley. He didn't want this to be their last night. He didn't want this to be the end. But if it was, he didn't want to waste it.

Taking another step forward, he closed Crowley in against the wall and lifted a hand to rest at Crowley's cheek.

"I love you," he admitted, staring up into those serpentine eyes.

It was everything he had been wanting to say for so long, everything he had been holding in. It was like a relief, the weight finally rolling off his shoulders. 

The demon shuttered, tears pooling in the corner of his eyes. 

"No."

"No?" Aziraphale echoed, frowning. When he had pictured it happening, he didn't expect rejection like this. 

"No! You don't get to say that tonight, you don't get to say that when it's the last night we have and you have nothing to lose. Not now, not-"

Crowley cut himself off, looking away. But he didn't move away from Aziraphale, something the angel was grateful for. 

"Love," Aziraphale began, raising his other hand to rest on Crowley's other cheek to pull him back to face him, "I'm not saying this because I have nothing to lose. I'm telling you I love you, here and now, because I have everything to lose. If it all goes pear-shaped tomorrow, I don't want to lose you. I can't bare to lose you. I couldn't live with myself if you had died without me every telling you how much I care. How much I love you. Because I do, dear. I love you so much, more than anything else in the world. More than my books, more than food. More than my clothes or tartan."

Tears had begun to fall from Crowley's eyes, wetting his cheeks. Aziraphale wiped them away. The demon titled his head to press a light kiss to Aziraphale's hand. 

"I love you, so so much angel."

Then, right after Crowley's soft admittance, Aziraphale felt a sensation on his chest. It wasn't painful. Instead, it tingled with warmth. Aziraphale felt like he would burst from the pure strength of his love for the being in front of him. 

Crowley must have experienced the same thing, because he pulled away moving to take off his shirt with a nervous look. The sensation stopped by the time Crowley had managed to remove his jacket and undershirt.

Right over where Crowley's heart would be if he was human sat the image of a single white feather. Aziraphale didn't have to look to know that a matching one would be found on his own chest, but black.

"It's-"

"A soulmark," Aziraphale agreed, reaching forward to touch it.

A warmth shot through him. Crowley shivered, leaning forward into the touch. 

"But we don't get soulmarks. We don't have soulmates," Crowley defended, his face scrunching up further in confusion. But the truth was simple, they were soulmates.

With a smile, Aziraphale looked up. Blue eyes met yellow as he understood. This was the point of everything, this was part of the plan. From the start She had planned it all. They needed to figure it out themselves to be able to get through everything. He just hoped that they were strong enough to deal with what came next. Too much time was wasted already. He didn't want to lose anymore. 

**Author's Note:**

> if you liked that feel free to check out my tumblr @goodalexomens :))


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